Getting Un-Busy
So far this week I've heard at least 5 people talk about how busy the next couple of months are going to be (at which point they let out a sigh or some other expression of exhaustion at the thought of it).
Whether it be because kids are getting out of school for the summer, schedules are shifting, vacations are on the horizon, weekends are filling up with weddings and BBQs, or work priorities are being juggled, a sense of our plates feeling full is in the air.
And while this is true - schedules do tend to be different and more full this time of year - we don't need to let ourselves get sucked into that busy vortex and feel so rushed that we lose sight of all of the awesome stuff happening around us.
The word "busy" to me always feels so constricting - it makes me feel a little short of breath, overwhelmed, and hurried. Like I don't have time to do the things I want to do because obligations are getting in the way.
It also makes me feel like I can't fully enjoy anything because I'm always anticipating the next thing that's on my schedule.
To me, busy is never fun - it's more of a four-letter word that signals that I've allowed other people to take control of my life.
That sound familiar to you? If so, and you're feeling that creepy little busy monster start to invade your brain - here are a few things that can help you reassess and get back on track:
Stop trying to multitask:
I know we've been trained to highlight the ability to multitask high atop our list of marketable qualities, but it's time to forget about that - for good. Rather than being efficient by doing multiple things at once, multitasking is really just our brains switching between tasks super quickly. For example, think about when you're having a conversation with a friend and something on their phone catches their attention mid-sentence - they physically can't continue their train of thought and read their phone at the same time, so they stop talking and enter the phone spiral of doom while you sit there waiting for them to finish what they were saying.
This is what life is like when we think we're multitasking - we're juggling multiple things and once, not giving anything our undivided attention, and are totally disconnected from the present moment. This is not only bad for our brains (it reduces grey matter - which is responsible for self-control, decision making, seeing, hearing, memory, emotions, speech, and muscle control), but it's bad for us on an emotional and interpersonal level as well - making us feel stressed, and making our loved ones feel unimportant.
Writing down a list of things we need to do and tackling them one-by-one gives us the freedom to be present for our life and do everything to the best of our ability - all while keeping stress at bay and grey matter intact. And please, for the love of green juice, put your phone away once in a while - they are the world's greatest drains of time and presence. You'll be amazed at how much time and focus you have to do things when your phone's not in the picture.
Let yourself off the hook:
There's only one of you, and you can't make everyone happy. I know many of us struggle with the guilt of saying "no" to invitations - but I can't tell you how essential it is. Every time you say "no" you're saying "yes" to yourself. Of course, there are some big life events that you'll want to be there for if you can swing it, but your neighbor's daughter's boyfriend will totally understand that you can't make it to his graduation party.
Many of us have gotten to the point where we've accepted overcommitting our time and energy as normal - and it's causing so much unnecessary stress in our lives. Time and energy are precious commodities - and should be treated as such.Bonus - you can say "no" even if you don't have a schedule conflict! As someone wise once said (can't remember who), "no is a complete sentence." Think of all that time you'll save trying to make up excuses and having anxiety wondering if event hosts will believe you or not. Amiright?!
Set the tone:
Broken-record alert. I'm about to talk about self-care again (shocking, I know)! But for realz, guys - if you set the tone for your day first thing in the morning, you'll be set up to make decisions that keep you mindful and out of overwhelm throughout the day. And if you do this everyday, it will become your way of being (neuroplasticity, y'all!). When you prioritize self-care, you naturally feel more fulfilled, less overwhelmed, and more connected to yourself and the world around you. "Busy" and "mindful" can't exist in your life at the same time.
At the very least, carve out a few minutes to get still and quiet in meditation each morning - take the time to connect in with something much bigger than yourself and your schedule. Creating this space gives you a fresh perspective and a balanced way of looking at all of the things that are filling your life (and mind). From that mindful space you can see clearly the things that are adding joy to your life (or, more specifically, your summer), and the things that aren't. And for the things that aren't - let yourself off the hook, as mentioned above - and then rinse and repeat until all you have left are things that contribute to a happy, easeful life.
P.S. dōTERRA must have got the memo that we're diving headfirst into "busy" season, because through the end of June they're giving away a free bottle of Motivate (Encouraging Blend), and Cheer (Uplifting Blend) for an order over 150 PV (fill out this form for ordering deets) - these are both from their Emotional Aromatherapy Kit and they are so freakin' great. These guys will help you get the important shit done, and feel super happy while doing it. BOOM!